My childhood friends and I were talking about life in our boarding school. As we focused on the sad side of life there, the burden became great and darkness covered my world. It was springtime on our Coast, but the flowers’ colors muted, the chickens sounds grated, the branches creaked, the birds screeched.
I have been here before. Here, there is a choice to make: accept the invitation of the tide, let it take me out to sea, to a dark sea of nothingness, where I can feel numb and still…
…or fight against it. Swim parallel to the shore, do not let the riptide take me in, but knowing I cannot swim against it, swim to the side to get out of its pull.
One choice is easier than the other One feels better than the other. But though that choice is easier in the moment, it opens the door to a life of loneliness, self-reliance, and depression.
Depressing the senses; not feeling life.
No, I won’t choose that.